Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Randomize
