she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
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