there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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