You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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