I'm going to rape someone's good day.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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