I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
