are you still at the devil's house?
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Randomize
