Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
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