4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
I am in a vortex of obligation.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
