we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
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