Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(239): View more from Florida

At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt

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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober

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(248): View more from Michigan

remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.

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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.

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(417): View more from Missouri

how was ur day?

(405): View more from Oklahoma

this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.

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(623): View more from Arizona

Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.

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(203): View more from Connecticut

No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.

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(205): View more from Alabama

I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his

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