Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
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