There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
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