She's JV to your varsity
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
We are all done wearing pants today
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
Randomize
