Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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