Need sex. Gaining weight.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize
