I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
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