honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
