my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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