At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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