remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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