the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Randomize
