So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Church boner. Awkwardddd
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
Randomize
