Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
This is my gift to your gina
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Randomize
