i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Randomize
