remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
I don't think brook has ever known best
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
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