I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize
