Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
and you said cock pushups were impossible
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Randomize
