It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Randomize
