from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
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