i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
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