I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
