Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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