Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
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