How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Randomize
