Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
Randomize
