Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
