He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
