pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Randomize
