So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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