your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Randomize
