need another drink. this is the easiest way
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
