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  • yes, but water doesn't get you drunk. no one drinks miller light for the taste.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 18, 09 at 1:57pm
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  • high life sucks try again tomorrow.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 19, 09 at 1:08am
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  • Water is cheaper than miller light and tastes about the same, poor move imo

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 18, 09 at 1:10pm
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  • jared brock is a winner at life

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 18, 09 at 3:49pm
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  • All you're missing is the DVD set of Star Trek and you have yourself a friday night masturbation special!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 18, 09 at 12:33pm
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  • This text message seems like it needs a follow-up the next day. Something like, "Woke up naked in a puddle of lube, surrounding by beer cans and microwave dinner trash."

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 18, 09 at 2:28pm
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  • Haha! I would swear this was my ex - but he lives in 978.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 18, 09 at 2:57pm
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  • the whole "you win life" joke is so stupid i can't stand it

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 18, 09 at 12:54pm
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  • sad night, glad I moved from the east bay. I could've had this poor guy for a neighbor.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 18, 09 at 8:17pm
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  • So this is site is supposed to be about funny drunk texts, right? And yet this shit gets posted- some loser planning his fun-filled night of drinking by himself, eating dinner alone, and the proceeding to jerk off.... HMMMM. For some reason it just doesn't add up.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 18, 09 at 3:46pm
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  • LMAO 1:03 well played.....well played I always keep praying that more emo kids will lose to the razor

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 18, 09 at 1:06pm
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  • why the fuck do all my hilarious texts from the east bay get rejected while this shit gets posted? i swear to god the people on this site want to make the east bay look like its full of idiots

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 19, 09 at 2:19am
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  • 12:54, oh, you'll stand it some more. Life will make sure of that.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 18, 09 at 1:03pm
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  • Reppin that pleasanton... Too bad it is a terrible text

    Submitted by chrisdomayer on Mar 12, 11 at 4:52am
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