the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
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