have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
