Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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