Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize
