Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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