I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
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