I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
